Showing posts with label Life abroad. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Life abroad. Show all posts

March 25, 2014

Marriage Arrangements in the Hamam

Nerelisin?
Where are you from?

Erkek arkadaşın?
Boyfriend?

Evli misin?
Are you married?

Bekarım. Bakmıyorum.
I'm single. I'm not looking. 

(I don't know if bakmıyorum translates well. Maybe aramıyorum is better; 'I'm not searching')

Later I am sitting on a marble slab, waiting to be scrubbed and massaged. One woman insists on pursuing the conversation.

Isveçli something something.

No, I'm not Swedish. I'm Canadian.

O Isveçli something something.

He's Swedish? Then how did you meet?

Kocamın kardeş something something.

[I will skip past the part when I confuse koca (husband) and hoca (teacher).]

Wait. He's your husband's brother? Then how is he Swedish?

O Isveçli something something istiyor. Sarı saç, mavi gözlü...

[Internal speech:] Oh, now I understand. He wants to marry a Swedish girl with blonde hair and blue eyes. Never mind that I'm not Swedish and I don't have blonde hair or blue eyes. Hey, we're all the same.

Kanada'ya döneyeceğim.
I'm going back to Canada.

O gelsin.
He can come.

Bakmıyorum, ama teşekkür ederim.
I'm not looking, but thank you (hand to heart, a gesture that has become a reflex).

Kaç yaşındasın?
How old are you?

28.

He is 29.

Ok.

Giyindikten sonra, biz fotoğraf çekebilir miyiz?
After we get dressed, can we take a picture?

Ok.

I make a point of leaving quickly and escape without a photo. 

In guide books, I believe I have read about how back in the day women used hamams to seek out potential brides for their sons, or in theory older sisters for their younger brothers. Umm... it's still happening.

March 10, 2014

Life these days


practicing the local archeological tour / key words: "flint" "adobe" "Roman baths"

Work

Basically, I'm teaching English to villagers who live along a ten day walking path in southeastern Turkey. The goal is that they can better communicate with tourists who come for the path, offering home stay experiences and walking tours.

Money going straight to villagers; the chance to promote other local projects like tree planting, dental health, and primary education; the possibility of real cultural exchange instead of just a tourism service–it's all pretty good.

Walking on the Plains

One nice thing about my work (ok, there are many) is that I can actually walk on the path.

17 km walk to work, from one village to another
a temple several thousand years old

Walking here is obviously very different from hiking in British Columbia. (Notice I can't even call it hiking). There are no mountains, you interact with farmers and shepherds along the way, and you are constantly reminded of past humans. It's just a different experience.

"Local, organic"

Everyone I work with has fields, gardens, orchards, and/or animals. Fresh eggs, homemade yogurt, home cured olives, local bulgur, dried eggplants, tomatoes, and peppers–all have been sent home with me. We roll rice in grape leaves picked in the summer, make salads with pomegranate syrup from the trees out back, and the bread is made from wheat grown in the fields and processed at the town mill.

Social life

In the end, though, I'm not a villager in southeastern Turkey. I don't have three kids already, for example. So I'm pretty stoked to have found in Urfa a small but groovy community of like-minded, equally childless people. And even a climbing gym.


Life is full these days, and time is flowing like water, as they say here. (su gibi geçer)

You can tell that there was a photo-savvy visitor in town. Thank you, Jakob.

February 9, 2014

So I guess I'm learning Kurdish

En route to a village where everyone speaks Kurdish but me


I actually came for Arabic


Many moons ago, my friend Melodee sent me by mail an article about bilingual Arabic-Turkish speakers in southeastern Turkey. Sweet, I thought. I've always wanted to go back to that cultural hot spot, and now I can go with the exciting mission of learning Arabic via Turkish. The bilingual Turks can guide me through the daunting underground caves of Arabic, using our shared Turkish as a headlamp.

Şanlıurfa? Sure.


I arrived in Turkey in November with this idea about Arabic in the southeast and also a vision of working in some position that connected to my values–spending time outside, learning and teaching in a human way, and sharing ideas about how to live. By fate, such a position was presented... in Şanlıurfa.

Şanlıurfa, unlike Antakya further south, is not really the city for learning Arabic. Yes, there are Arabic speakers, especially now in the form of displaced people from the conflict in Syria, but the city is primarily Kurdish. I am told that Şanlıurfa is 80% Kurdish, and I believe that means that 80% of people speak Kurdish as a first language.

For instance, many of the people I work with now speak Kurdish as a first language, and Turkish as a close or far second. Turkish ability seems to vary with education, access to Turkish media, and communication with non-Kurdish speakers. These are also the people teaching me Kurdish, using our common second language of Turkish to explain things.

Learning Kurdish via Turkish is probably a huge mistake


Reason 1: The languages are not from the same family. 

Turkish is Turkic. Kurdish is Indo-European. There are some overlapping words, but not that many, based on what I have heard.

Note: Of the two major dialects of Kurdish, I am learning Kurmanji, the northern, versus Sorani, the southern.

Reason 2: The Turkish alphabet sucks at describing Kurdish sounds. 

I began writing Kurdish words with my own made-up transliteration system. Now with the thought that it may be useful in the future, I'm trying to use what Kurdish speakers use in Turkey–the standard Turkish alphabet.

Although no expert after a mere week, I can already tell that letters are missing or inadequate for the sounds of Kurdish. The throaty ‘kh’ that’s similar to Arabic is one thing, as well as a vowel between Turkish ‘e’ and ‘a’.

Kurdish stuff seems to always be political in Turkey, and the inadequate alphabet is no exception. Only last year did the government legalize the use of letters Q, W, and X, [I know–there's a potential satirical Sesame Street episode here] which are used for transliterating Kurdish, but which don’t otherwise exist in Turkish.

See the alphabet issue in this strongly-titled article by a journalist who maintains a devoted blog on Kurdish matters. You can also see the same article written in Turkish and written in Kurdish. [Note to self: Potential learning/self-educating materials].

Kurdish–my long lost cousin?


Learning issues aside, one cool thing about this language is that it feels eerily familiar, like a long lost cousin that shows up with features and mannerisms I know intimately, but wouldn’t notice until someone pointed them out.

Because it is an Indo-European language, and there are so many other Indo-European languages swilling around in my brain in varying quantities (English, Spanish, French, Italian, German, Hindi, Farsi...) every Kurdish word sounds like a possible cognate.

na (no)
du (two)
bra (brother)

Today a woman taught me ba for ‘wind’. It stuck easily. A list of cognates online points out that ba is a cognate for vent (‘wind’ in French). More from the list:

ster (star)
mer (mari in French) (man)
merane (manly)
nu (new)
brusk (blitz in German) (storm)

As my friend Alaina said, it makes the world seem even more like one big family.

February 7, 2014

Am I searching?

Din?

Religion?

               Ah... çok dindar bir insan değilim.

               Ah... I'm not a very religious person.

               Benim için, herkesi seviyorum... açık olmak önemli bir şey...

               For me, I like everyone... to be open is an important thing...

Oh, hümanist. [My new friend shows her disappointment].

               Yeah, sure. [Is a humanist really the worst thing to be?]

               Ama, dinlere ilgileniyorum!

               But I'm interested in religions! [Is this true? There's a gleam in my interlocutor's eye, in any case.]

somethingsomethingsomething araştır somethingsomething

               Araştır... araştırmak...?

'To search'

               Oh! Am I searching? [The gleam makes sense. My friend is here to help.]

               No... no.

[24 hours later, I am kindly offered a Koran.]

February 4, 2014

Hazards of Living Alone


This video was originally to celebrate and make fun of my enormous new living space. So many rooms, so much marble flooring. So little furniture to impede dancing.

Now it is also to celebrate breaking back into my blogging account, after Google barricaded me with impossible security questions and a verification system based on a forgotten phone number.

Welcome to Urfa!
Welcome (back) to the blog!

I envision posting a fair amount in the coming weeks, focusing on learning Turkish (and maybe Kurdish), understanding cultural phenomena of eastern Turkey, and the usual life musings that arise when you have an abundance of time and space and an absence of familiar routines.

January 30, 2013

Rooms I have known and loved

East Vancouver, April 2012-present
(with a 2-month break)

Tetouan, Morocco, October 2009-July 2010

San Cristobal, Galapagos, January-August 2009
(though some was on a different island)

Istanbul, Turkey, February 2008

I wish I had photos of all the rooms I've lived in.

These four have in common:

Good light and a lack of clutter.

June 5, 2010

Everything is fine



The process of cultural adjustment, which is also known as the U-shaped curve of cultural adjustment, encompasses five distinct stages:


  • Stage 1: The feeling of excitement and eagerness. This stage occurs before leaving to go to the new culture.
  • Stage 2: The feeling that everything in the new culture is great. This stage occurs upon arrival to the new culture.
  • Stage 3: The feeling of everything in the new culture is terrible.
  • Stage 4: The feeling of adjustment. The stage where the visitor begins to feel comfortable and takes steps to become more familiar with the culture.
  • Stage 5: The feeling that everything is fine. The stage where the visitor has adapted to the culture and in some ways is embracing it as their own.

(Wikipedia)

May 2, 2010

"Tenemos una problema con los pajaros"


Birds in vents, like bugs in dates or ants on the counter, are the little things that make expatriates throw temper tantrums. The housewife calls her husband in tears--"I'm not fucking living in this hellhole anymore!"--not because the new culture denies her opportunity to work, or requires her to cover her head, or takes her away from friends and family, but because there are weevils in the flour, which she discovered when she went to make cookies that morning.

I woke up to birds in the house, again. It's been a week-long saga, women vs. birds. It began when Alaina found two dead under the window; while we slept, they had battered and exhausted themselves in their efforts to escape. "But where did they come from?" we asked. Alaina identified the source--the vent in the kitchen above the water heater, which connects to the great outdoors. They had built a nest up there. Since then, one or two fall down the vent each day and must be guided out through a window or door.

It took a few days for an action plan to emerge. Alaina talked to The Haj, our neighbour. I haven't been keen on The Haj since he told me in Spanish that I didn't speak Spanish ("Pero..."). I've come back around, though, because we both agree on siestas. Anyway, Alaina and The Haj together bought a metal contraption to block the birds from entering from outside. Before we applied it, we had to to get the man who delivers the gas tanks to come up and clean out the nest.

As of this morning, the man who delivers the gas tanks had not come. Two birds had fallen through the vent and it was not even 11AM. I knocked on The Haj's door. "Tenemos una problema con las pajaros." He saw the wildness in my eyes (Plus, having woken to birds, I had not brushed my teeth or brushed my hair). He jumped into action.

And here is where the weevils and bugs and ants and birds are balanced by the humanity of dealing with such problems. In North America, getting someone to come and fix something for you requires a phone call, an appointment, maybe half an hour with customer service, and then a wait. The Haj went downstairs, found the man who delivers the gas tanks, and came back up, bringing his own ladder. Fifteen minutes and two full bags of nest later, the metal contraption was in place and sanity was restored to our home. The Haj suggested I tip the man who delivers gas tanks 10 dirhams ($1.10), which I already had in hand for the occasion. Bueno.

April 12, 2010

"Home"

Soup and salad at the nameless place around the corner: 10 dirhams

A pirated copy of New Moon: 13 dirhams

Dinner and a movie watched with my roomie, without leaving the comfort of a two-block radius: priceless.

After two weeks on the road, it's good to be "home."

February 19, 2010

The intensity of living

7:30

A mosquito, God’s most annoying alarm clock, bites me on the nose. I refuse to be fussed. Do morning stretches and sit down to write. I’ve been doing this for a few years now, on and off. Rain is falling and the mountains are white with fog.

9:30

Oatmeal. I took a taxi to Tangier yesterday to buy it. Useless girls claimed they didn’t know the street and gave me a “huh” look, the specialty of teenagers. I entered the Spanish institute across the street. Donde esta calle Inglaterra? A Moroccan employee happily walked me to my destination. Gracias, y baslama.

The woman in the grocery store didn’t speak French, so I switched to Arabic. Min hinaya ila taksi kabira ila Tetouan, bishahal? Ashara dirham, au sebaa. That was nice.

10:30

Hamam. Amina is not as good a masseuse as her sister, but I love that every time is different. Today I was in a private stall, because the big room was too cold, Amina said. She really tried to talk to me. Maybe I’ll switch from classical Arabic to Moroccan dialect. I want to talk.

11:45

Mosaic. Alaina is there already. Young Mohamed is, too, and he is playing loud, obnoxious music on tinny speakers. Eventually I stand up and order him to turn it off, if just for an hour. I want to work, I say in classical Arabic, and I am not sure he understands. I finish my mosaic design for a fountain with the help of Ali.

Walk through the medina. It’s still raining, so we dodge umbrellas and soak our feet in puddles. I buy figs, bananas, cabbage, and two carrots. The fig man is funny. Ever since I said that his figs were the greatest and he corrected me—Allah is the greatest (to which I replied that after Allah, his figs really were the greatest)—he has been very warm.

2

Lunch at La Union. An old man follows me to my seat. He elicits in Spanish that I am Canadian, and says in passable English that he was in Quebec and Ottawa. Why? Muj…something about working in a mosque. He asks what I will be having for lunch. Couscous? No, soup. Ah, harira, he says. He asks if I have something for him. I fish around in my pocket and find a 10 dirham coin. Three more beggars come up to me in the course of my lunch, but I am out of change and annoyed to be hassled.

I eat tomato soup, an omelet, bread, and finish with a café au lait. This is ordered in Spanish and Arabic.

3

Arabic. I read Fatima my sentences in past tense. This is my favorite tense so far. It makes sense. I can see the three parts of every Arabic word clearly. I can see the shapes as they come out of my mouth. “I went to Ecuador and stayed there for eight months. I taught at a university. I didn’t study Spanish, but after a couple months, I knew some words, and I spoke with people. I listened a lot, and that helped me. I felt happy to speak.” And now I feel happy, because you are speaking! Fatima exclaims. I really like her. Half the reason I go to Arabic is to make her laugh.

We look at pictures and she asks me to make a story in past tense. I have to ask the word for café—maqha. Mecca? I ask. Haha, no. “They went to the café, and then maybe they went to Mecca.” Hahaha. It’s funny in Arabic. Then I make up a story about a woman who was a taxi driver, but then she decided to go to university. She studied French and graduated and got a job at the United Nations. Alumam almutahida. Hahaha.

I show Fatima what I want her to teach me on Tuesday. We’ll do three weeks of Moroccan dialect, because my brother is coming, and we’ll be traveling in the south, and I want to navigate in Arabic. For Fatima to teach me what I want, I have to give it to her in French. I stayed up last night with Babelfish to check my translated phrases.

4

Run into Ali the Brazilian on the way home. I thought he was still stuck in Spain! Apparently Morocco let him back in. He rubs me with his beard when we kiss cheeks. We can’t decide what language to speak, because he has been speaking French with his friends, and I have just come out of Arabic. We settle for English and Spanish, mixed.

4:30

Music conservatory. A really chatty new guy in choir says we won’t start until five. Then he asks if I’m a Muslim. La. He says something about the Koran and how great it is. I smile politely and go upstairs to the Institut des Beaux-Arts.

Coming out is Abderrahim, whom I was supposed to meet earlier. I explain that I got stuck at mosaic in the rain, and show him the text that wouldn’t send—I really need to deal with my phone. He laughs it off and tells me not to worry. I have 20 minutes now, so we go upstairs to his makeshift office to look at the stop-motion animations that he wants me to narrate. Does he have an idea about the content? Nope. Wow. It’s like the drawings he gave me to add writing to—totally open to interpretation. Immediately I think of the Morccan culture guide that I read two weeks ago. The chapter on friendships would be hilarious as a voiceover, to go with the two characters in his animation. All this is in French—crude, but functional, like a wrench. I tell him about my idea to write poetry to go with his other images. I tell him about the BBC “MyWorld” competition, too, that Alaina and I want to enter.

5

Choir. We don’t sing the song I know, so I read along. As people come in, they give me that warm, good-to-see-you nod. Iman kisses both cheeks and asks if I got her message. No. She says she’ll come over tomorrow to teach me some more of the songs.

6

Quick dinner of leftover lubia (white beans with a savoury tomato sauce) and rice, and one of those perfectly ripe bananas from the medina.

6:30

Advanced One. In the last class, they recorded themselves doing interviews. “Moroccans on the Air” was the title of the mock radio show. The idea was that the Moroccan ministry of tourism had decided to do a publicity campaign to attract tourists and investment. Part of the campaign was having “average Moroccans” on radio shows across North America. So today, we gather around the laptop and write notes as we listen. They give each other written feedback with error correction. I teach them the positive-negative-positive feedback sandwich. They’ll write observations on their own speaking as homework. Then we introduce the new unit, “Family.” I write Marian, Richard, Steven, and Andy on the board and wait for the students to ask questions. We get around to living in Saudi, and Aicha is fascinated. She’s 22 and wants to go live in an English-speaking country to improve her speaking, so that she can work for an American company, but she’s also married, and it’s unlikely her husband will up and move. Later we learn that Aicha has a twin.

8

Liquor store. The only one in Tetouan that I’m aware of. Masa al-khair. Labes? Bighair? Alhamdulilah. Vino, por favor. Pero no hay grandes de eso? Hmm…dos “Flags” entonces. (This is beer made in Morocco.) Bishahal? Thirty-one. English? Sometime English, sometime Swede…Shukran. La shukr. Bslama. Bye. Ciao.

9

Dance party of one. I do this most nights. Then I have to lie down on my back, because I’m reeling. So many projects! So many languages! So much…And Tetouan gives. It gives and gives and gives.

11

“Two a Day” on MTV. Alaina and I stare in horror. The program doesn’t end until the wide receiver and the varsity cheerleader shoot a deer. The discussion turns to anticipated culture shock. Is it going to hurt? 

February 9, 2010

Wiki days


When you live abroad, you might find it easier to experiment with living, because you have already broken your routine. For example, you might designate a day to looking up on Wikipedia all the things that made you go, "I wish I knew more about..."

This week:
World War I and II
Arabic -- syllabic or time-based?
New Zealand
vestigial organs

Now I know what the appendix was for. It digested cellulose for our herbivorous ancestors. And look at that sweet picture of a baleen whale again. Picture c indicates its undeveloped hind legs. What!

December 2, 2009

Continued

Act V, Scene 2

Late evening, after class. The girls chat companionably, confident in the modern magic of antibiotics and looking forward to Dimetap dreams.

Alaina: I think it's the cold air. It was all of a sudden. I took a breath in and then I was just coughing and coughing.

Mary: I know. [She glances at the two barely-functional space heaters in the living room]. I feel like we're going to be cold for the next four months.

Alaina: Uh huh.

Mary: The other day was the worst, when the water wouldn't get quite hot in the shower.

Alaina: I know. We could start going to the hamam once a week.

Mary: Actually, that's a good idea. Then we could just take maintenance showers once or twice a week. My hair is so gross. I haven't washed it for a long time. 

Alaina: It doesn't look that bad.

A few minutes later.

Alaina: OK, when I said it didn't look that bad, it's because I looked over and I thought, "It looks fine. It looks like Mary just wetted it down." You didn't wet it down, did you?

Mary: No. It's that oily.

Alaina: Eww.

Mary: I know.

Scene 3

The next day. Mary comes in the front door and goes directly to the kitchen, where she turns a knob on a gas-powered water heater. The flame takes.

Mary: OK, man, it's time for a super overdue shower!

Alaina: Have fun. [She is reading an Arabic magazine in the living room].

A minute passes. We hear the shower running. Suddenly, the water stops.

Mary: Alaina, are you using the water?!

Alaina: What?!

Mary: Are you using the water?! It's getting cold!

Alaina: No!

Mary: Fuck my life--I'm going to kill someone if I can't take a hot shower right now! I'm covered in shampoo!

Alaina: Umm...I think we're low on gas. Yeah, the flame doesn't look right.

[We hear the tap turn back on in the bathroom].

Mary: Now it's freezing!

Alaina: Yeah, we're outta gas.

Silence.

December 1, 2009

From the unfinished script of "Sick Abroad"

Act IV, Scene 2

Alaina and Mary, now both dying of the flu (symptoms include cough, nasal congestion, dizziness, aches and pains, and nausea) have been directed by their colleague Abdelrahman to Dr. Moline, whose office is next to the Avenida Theatre. Unable to locate the doctor's office, they limp into a money exchange to ask for directions.

Mary: Sabah al-khair.

Man: Sabah al-khair.

Mary: Parlez-... Oh, sorry, go ahead, Alaina.

Alaina: Smaali... [she asks in Darija for the directions]

Scene 3

The girls find the correct building and walk up a flight of stairs. They pause on the landing to catch their breath. When they look at the door of Dr. Moline's office, they see a sign. Mary reads only the numbers: 30 and 6. Alaina reads the words silently.

Mary: It's closed from the 30th to the 6th, isn't it?

Alaina: Yep.

Mary: Ok.

Scene 4

They have decided to go directly to a pharmacy, even though it means their Moroccan medical insurance won't reimburse them for the cost of medicine. Alaina leads them to a modern-looking pharmacy on the corner. They begin by addressing the man at the cashier. Alaina, in her weakened state, has opted not to proceed in Darija.

Alaina: Se habla español?

Man: [shouts for someone from the back]

A woman appears.

Woman: Oui?

Alaina: All you.

Mary: Nous cherchons antibiotiques pour [inhales and exhales, pointing to the lungs]... les...pulmo...? 

Woman: Bronchitis?

Mary: Peut-etre. Nous avons [mimes a rough cough]. Et ici [sniffles and points to nasal congestion]. Nous avons besoin d'antibiotiques.

Woman: Combien de jours...? [I forget how she said..."have you had this cough?"]

Mary: Moi, trois jours. Et elle, deux.

Woman: Tu penses que c'est le meme...

Mary: Nous habitons ensemble, donc...

Woman: Ah, oui, d'accord.

Woman nods and disappears to the back. The pharmacy feels uncomfortably hot, especially with all the layers. Both Alaina and Mary have scarves wrapped around their necks and their heads covered. At last, the woman returns. She explains in French how to take the antibiotics and the cough medicine. They pay at the cashier.

Man: Shukran.

Girls: Shukran.

Woman: [French equivalent of "Hope you get better soon"]

Mary: Merci beaucoup.

Act V, Scene 1

That evening, at the American Language Center, in the big room upstairs. Intermediate 4 students are trickling in. On the whiteboard: Movie Day!

Amina: Teacher, you are sick?

Mary: Can you tell?

Hamza [who speaks only with sincerity]: Teacher, you will be alright.

November 13, 2009

Jooj


This little urchin followed me for three whole blocks, until I relented and asked the price of his pathetic bundles of Kleenex. Jooj. Jooj? Jooj. Fine, two dirhams, 30 cents, let's do it. The photo was free. After all, men in the plaza sell the same packages for one dirham.

Fun fact: 1-10, the numbers are the same in Darija (Moroccan Arabic)  and Fus-ha (Standard Arabic), with the exception of 2. Jooj here, ithnane elsewhere.

November 9, 2009

Flowers for the good life


The man remembered me from last week when I bought white flowers and he added an extra dos as a regalo. On the street, everyone smiled at them. Winter is coming--you can feel it in the near-constant wind--but the sun is still shining, and it lit up the roses. They'll last all week and make us happy. They smell so good.

November 8, 2009

The costs of things, Part 3


After the flight, every cost depends on where you are and what you do. In Tetouan, Morocco...

Flat loaves of fresh bread: $0.27
Café au lait: $1
A kilo of the best olives: $2
Local wine: $5
Soup, salad, couscous, cookies, fruit, and tea in a nice restaurant: $10
Bus to Tangier: $2
Balcony seat at the movie theatre: $3
French classes for the next 3 months: $90
Printmaking course: $28
Massage at the hamam: $4.50
View of the mountains: free

November 7, 2009

The costs of things, Part 2


The biggest single cost of travel might be the flight. Fortunately, any flight is cheap divided over enough time. If you spend $1000 to get where you want to go and stay one week, then every day costs you $143 before you do anything. This is insane. Stay a month, though, and a day costs $33. Stay 10 months and a day costs just $3.30 in flight money.

November 6, 2009

The costs of things, Part 1


"How can you afford to travel all the time? Isn't it expensive?" 

No, it is not expensive.

Think of everything you stop spending money on. No rent. No heat. No water and electricity. No landline. No cell phone. No internet. No car payments. No car insurance. No parking. No bus pass. (You might want these where you go, but factor them out first). No $4 coffee. No $8 drinks. No $10 cover. People are blind to how much they spend, because they are plugged into a Matrix-like system that sucks their money as fast as they make it. People call this system a "normal" lifestyle. Just remembering those costs makes me wonder,

"How can you afford to live in North America? Isn't it expensive?"

October 31, 2009

It's a roller coaster


Learning! Exploring! Changing!

Hooray for Morocco.

Everyone at home is dressing up and drinking and laughing and slurring and making out.

Damn you, Morocco.

Maria from Sweden carries her baby on our walk and school kids greet us in French and Spanish. Later, her American husband Eric shows me his woven-paper tapestries. On the way home, the cute grocer on the corner sells me plums and dark grapes in Spanish and Arabic. Couples walk before the sun sets.

Hooray for Morocco.

I go for my first run and fall in the gravel, tripping over my loose pants. In Canada, I would have been wearing shorts or tights. Hands ooze and six dogs circle the corner ahead.

Damn you, Morocco.

The first day of Creative Writing 101. Eight students come and they are so into it, so engaged, that they keep going when the activity ends. We walk out to palm trees and honeysuckle swaying in the warm breeze. It is almost November and we are wearing sunglasses.

Hooray for Morocco.

October 29, 2009

"fierce, dodgy seven-year-olds"


I'm reading a novel called Johnno. It's about two boys growing up and leaving Brisbane, Australia. The words are precisely chosen (the author, David Malouf, is a poet, after all) and the observations are unsettling because they feel true and familiar.

"Like most sons I suppose, I had forced upon my father the character that fitted most easily with my image of myself; to have had to admit to any complexity in him would have compromised my own. I chose the facts about him that I needed."

"[Johnno] felt the need to reach out only when he was either desperately miserable or in some sort of ecstasy, and I knew, as he must have, that by the time his words reached me, five thousand miles away, as I was rushing out of the house for a tram, his mood would already be gone--replaced by whatever it was his silences represented: long stretches of sitting alone in a tent at the end of nowhere..."

"We didn't go to Greece. Or even to Brittany. Johnno, I soon realized, was mesmerized by Paris, his dreams of leaving it for one corner of Europe or another were simply alternatives that he allowed to exist for a moment because they made Paris itself, and his presence in it, so much more solid and absolute. Paris was the city for which Greece, Spain, Sweden, and other places too numerous to mention, had been rejected. As for me, I was just a tool in Johnno's process of making Paris real for himself, and I soon tired of it."

"Meanwhile, after three years, people at home began to think of me as an expatriate.

An extraordinary denomination. What did it mean? It seemed too grand to fit anything I felt about my position, or any decision I had made to leave Australia and start again elsewhere. I had found it odd, gratuitous even, that I should be an Australian. I found it even odder, more accidental, that I should be anything else. Friends who came to visit on working holidays were resentful of my being so settled. Their resentment found its object in certain habbits that they thought of as non-Australian and therefore a betrayal. Like calling the pictures the "cinema" and sandshoes "plimsols". Like reading The Times. Like wearing sandals with socks. Impossible to tell them that all this was quite fortuitous. That I hadn't chosen "silence, exile, cunning", had never left Australia in more than fact. That going to sleep at night was still, for me, to climb high into the glossy dark leaves of the old fig tree outside our kitchen window in Edmondstone Street, with flying-foxes rustling in its darkness, and long golden strands hanging from its branches like a giant's beard, and butcher-birds or mynahs picking about in the sunlight, between roots that pushed deep in under the house, lifting the concrete under the washtubs and even sometimes shifting a stump, far away under our sleep. Expatriate? What did it mean? Nothing it seemed to me. Except that the tree below my bedroom window here was a weeping beech that in summer filled the whole view with its brittle leaves and in winter let through the houses opposite, with frost repointing the edges of their bricks. The children in the flat below hung gobbets of meat from its boughs, and all winter the birds came to peck at strips of belly-pork or pick the last shreds from a mutton chop. A red setter loped through the yellowing stalks of the over-grown garden, sniffing, freezing--hunting blind in his own territory. There was nothing exotic about all this. I taught school all week, drank at the Carnarvon Castle or the Queens on Friday night. Saturday afternoon shopping. A Sunday walk to the top of Bidston Hill, with a long view across open country to an estuary and golflinks by the sea. In the town itself men from the shipyards in their heavy lumbermen's rig and donkey jackets still grimy from work, dragging their boots over the sawdust in dockside pubs and bursting noisily into the street at closing-time, stumbling off for a piss in cobbled backs. It wasn't something I had chosen. I was here, that's all. I had never left anywhere..."